Whaddayaknow Wednesday- "We Don't Need No Stinkin' Bailout" Portugal Begs, Gets $115 Billion Bailout; Finland Has Last Word On Bailout For Portugal; Oil Prices Fall On Decreased Demand; Japanese Production Decimated 15% In March Alone; Toyota, Honda Both Report 62% Decline; Radiation Found In Shipping Containers In Belgium That Were Shipped March 16th; Fukuwhat?; Much More

It feels good to be right, so today, we will begin with news from the EU, where it is being buried by the main stream media reported that Portugal has been handed a $115 Billion bailout. Well, whaddayaknow?! Of course, they have said for over two months that they Do. Not. Need. A. Bailout. All the while, we have been saying for exactly two months that Portugal will indeed be the very next PIIG to get a bailout. Et voila. 

Hu Who do you believe? According to an article today in Forbes, you can't believe these talking heads. In fact, the Prime Minister of Luxembourg, Jean-Claude Juncker was quoted as saying, "When it becomes serious, you have to lie." Really now? Gosh! And we believed every word you spoke, like we believed every word about Fukushima... not.

Make sure you read through that article and see how apropos it is to just about everything you are being fed. It's a tell all article, but the drama about Portugal's illegal handout bailout is just getting started. The juiciest parts come from reading through the bailout agreement, like the part where insolvent Greece and Ireland will help fund this bailout (with Hu's who's money?). Ironically, Greece is weeks, if not days away from "restructuring" their own debt so how exactly is this supposed to work? What a circus. Perhaps Mr. Trichet's real name is Barnum or Bailey.

However, we don't think the British citizens will be laughing too hard at the theatrics, because they have been sucked into this giant ponzi scheme circle-jerk bailout by providing the second largest amount of the bailout. Don't think you'll ever see that money again, either. Did we mention what percentage the banksters will be getting? Forgetaboutit. You'd rather not know. Keep your little sheeple mind focused on Osama Bin Dead For Nine Times Laden's death. The good news is, Finland. Yes, good cold Finland has the final say and if their demands aren't met, this bailout won't be so easy to access. We'll see how this plays out by the 13th.

Speaking of Friday the 13th, remember how you heard from the experts on CNBS that the Fukushima catastrophe would somehow be positive for the global economy? Remember that? Well Honda Motors is reporting along with Toyota Motors that their production is down 62% in March. Must be the economic recovery. Another green shoot, Dr. Deficit. We can't wait to see this quarter's results like the radiation readings of a cargo container that just arrived in Belgium showing radioactive cesium 137. Guess when that container was shipped from Japan? The 16th of March. As you know, things have only gotten better since then. In fact, according to TEPCO and the Japanese gov't, Fukushima is back up and producing electricity... or not.

Don't worry about the radiation encircling the globe, entering food and water sources and being detected in soil samples. The EPA won't be monitoring radiation any longer because levels are decreasing. Remember that article in Forbes? Now is a good time to reread it.

With oil demand plunging due to an ongoing economic depression  all of the economic growth we see, it's no wonder jobs are back.

Updates

Update 1: What's another $2 Trillion? Nothing the click of a computer button can't fix. The Treasury is requesting the debt limit be upped by $2 Trillion so they can have enough funding through December 2012. Just in time for the Mayan calendar to end. 

Update 2: Osama Bin Dead Long Time Laden. We've got the confirmation here. 

Bernanke says, 'What inflation? There's no stinking inflation!'

As WTI crude hits $107pb and the national average price per gallon of gas hits $3.51, I present you with this:

It's interesting to note that just last week Fed Chairman, Ben Bernanke (a.k.a Dr. Deficit) gave testimony regarding the state of the economy and the results of "quantitative easing" to the House Financial Services Committee stating basically that inflation is low, too low in fact.


I'm not quite sure what his definition of inflation is exactly, but I doubt he does his own food shopping, let alone, gas up the limo. I won't go into how flawed the CPI (the Fed's inflation measure) is, but The United Nations FAO (Food and Agriculture Organization) published a report last week stating global food prices have hit an all time high in February, after setting two previous records in December and January. See a trend? 

So when Dr. Deficit says to the Financial Committee,

I recognize that the increases in gas prices are very troubling for a lot of people and very difficult, but they are not inflation per se. Inflation is an increase in the overall price level, which is very low...

I start to get worried. 


Dr. Deficit's automated, pre-programmed Harvard grad response of course is roughly that gas and food prices are very volatile and thus omitted from the inflation metric. Unfortunately, someone forgot to educate the good Doctor on the impact of sustained high gas prices on the working middle class in an oil dependent global economy. Did I mention the last time oil was at $107pb in 2008, the economy imploded? I doubt this time around, the "economy" or whatever remains of it, will be able to survive sustained oil above $90, let alone $107. To make things worse, I doubt their calculations took into account the impact on oil prices in the event of an all out war in the Middle East or a major natural disaster, for example.


So while the politicians, experts and economists continue to tout "trickle down economics" (a.k.a "quantitative easing, a.k.a ZIRP, a.k.a too big to fail, a.k.a TARP, et al) as the answer to this depression, I present to you the unintended consequence and alter ego of "trickle down economics" called "trickle up poverty" (a.k.a inflation). Welcome to the new normal.


With that said, as things heat up in the Middle East, it's obvious to expect oil prices to rise, right along with silver and gold despite a last ditch effort of tapping into the nation's Strategic Oil Reserve. How fast can you spell "social unrest?"