Theatrical Thursday- Greenpeace Slams Japan As Marine Samples Outside Territory Indicate Radiation 60 Times Limits, As Yet Another Leak Discovered; Here Come The Birth Defects As Mutated Bunny Is Born Without Ears; Japanese Parents Furious Over Gov't Lies, Propaganda; Higher Levels Of Iodine 131 Detected Indicates Continual Leakage And Fussion; Super Typhoon Songda Heading For Fukushima; Next AIG? Insurers Face Record Losses From Catastrophes; "British Workers Are Lazy," So Says Ratan Tata As He Cuts 1500 Jobs In The UK; Much More

Who needs to go to the movies anymore to see radioactive mutant freaks? Who needs to read a Dan Brown novel to get a good conspiracy? Who needs to read a comic strip to get a good laugh? These days, with the sequential catastrophic events taking place and the circus clowns that run the show fumbling around like a cheap circus act, the answer is no one. That's correct - we have all the comedy, drama and theatrics we need right here in front of us, as if we live in a real Twilight Zone and we are spectators turned participants. Pick your poison:

Radioactive Mutant Freaks 
We all know the story of Godzilla and the metaphor that it stands for. Ironically, real radioactive mutant freaks are being discovered slowly as time goes by and the impact of radiation (not the healthy kind a la Ann Coulter) is seen on the environment. Case in point - the first earless bunny ever, born a few days ago outside of the evacuation zone. Uh oh! The original video commentary reads:

"After the nuclear accident, government and the media said there was no immediate effect on the health. But in the town of Namie Tsushima, which is outside the 30 kilometer area or outside the mandatory evacuation zone, it happened. So far as there has been no news about this kind, it certainly makes one suspect that the government is deliberately making an effort to keep news of the radiation leak a secret. The rabbits, which are housed in an outdoor bunny pen, are eating wild grass, which resulted in earless bunny's birth. This is the first anomaly/deformation ever born. Life cycle of a bunny is quicker than humans. As I am wondering if humans will be the next victim, I imagine the future picture of human babies." 

Let's say that again - UH OH! It is only a matter of time before human babies which develop much slower than rabbits are born with defects and given this incredible biological deformation, it's a given. We told you so. Get out of dodge people. Read the commentary again and pass it along.

Good Conspiracy

We (the informed people of Fiat's Fire) already know about Japan forbidding GreenPeace to take water and marine samples within its water territories and we can assume it is because they do not want them to ring the alarm bell with their findings. What are they hiding? Fortunately, GreenPeace was able to take samples outside the 12 mile territorial zone and the results are alarming. Highly contaminated water and marine life - up to 60 times the safe limit were found and as this Reuters article points out, they slammed Japan for it. The same article also points out that yet another leak has been discovered. [Insert Goofy voice, again] "Well gee golly Mickey, we would have never known about that. I mean Arnie Gundersen has been saying this for weeks now and since they are finding ever higher levels of radioactive iodine 131, it goes without saying." See, even Goofy knows basic science. No need to read a comic book. Now we know why they were not allowed to take samples within the 12 mile territory. The levels there must be thousands of times higher.

Drama
We were not surprised that the good Asimo robots Japanese people have been so calm for so long - until now, that is. Finally, after months of "rogue citizens" reporting high radiation levels, after months of "rumors" about what really happened, after the first ever earless deformed rabbit is born, now parents are demanding answers and they're getting rowdy. It's only a matter of time before the first child with three eyes is born and the T-1000's turn on their makers. Calling Skynet, time for a new model.

Tear Jerker 
In a possible turn for the worst, a Super Typhoon named "Songda" is heading right for Fukushima. Of course, Typhoons are quite common and it was only a matter of time before the season swung into high gear. This could be it. Not even a circus tent will keep the radiation from spreading all over Japan. Keep your eyes on this one. Updates will be here when available so check back and grab the Kleenex box. You might need it.

Comedy

For all the laughs you need, read the recent Ransquawk headlines from the IMF and ECB going back and forth about Greece, Ireland, the viability (or rather the lack of) of the Euro, and the economy in general. Ready? Grab the popcorn, sit back and enjoy the show.

Lights. Camera. Action! [Insert Circus Music Let it play while reading the following, seriously]

IMF's Blanchard says "no country obviously overheating, including China" (And we thought 20% Unemployment was too hot)

IMF's Blanchard says "more official funding for Greece will be needed; Greek recession deeper than IMF predicted" (Say it ain't so! [cough!] Endless money pit) 

IMF's Blanchard says "Greek debt restructuring is not inevitable, and Greek debt restructuring wouldn't affect world recovery in substantial way" (Maybe because there is no recovery to begin with)

Irish finance minister says "Ireland would suffer serious contagion whatever happens in Greece" (But wait, that IMF guy just said it wouldn't affect... oh never mind)

EU's Juncker says "Italy, Belgium not at risk" (We couldn't tell from the bond yields and CDS spreads)

IMF's Blanchard says "Greek adjustment programme has not completely derailed, and Greek economy will need an "adjustment period" of 10 years" (Glad to know it has not "completely derailed," just 99% derailed, and that Greece only needs 10 more years. By then, Hu who will be at the helm of this Titanic?)

ECB's Gonzalez-Paramo says "crisis still unfolding, cannot tell with certainly how economic and financial system will function in future" (Is this code word for the end of the financial system is near?)

IMF's Blanchard says "end of US Fed's QE2 policy would be 'minor event' for world economy" (Sure, and Fukushima was 'bullish' for the global economy)

IMF's Blanchard says "US economic recovery weak, housing market to remain 'dead' for a while" (So we've got a homeless, jobless "recovery" for another what, 10 years?)

Sci-fi, or Not So Sci-fi

Radioactive earless mutant rabbits capable of stomping out entire cities in a single leap could be one reason underground bunkers are all the rage nowadays. But it also could be because this so-called "comet" Elenin that is supposed to come around September - November is not a comet after all. It's scary to think, it could be as this "sky watcher" video using NASA JPL data suggests is, indeed a brown dwarf star. That would explain several unexplainable events including the recent spike in huge earthquakes, anomalies and why although detected as having a huge mass the size of Jupiter, it is not entirely visible. For you science buffs, it's a must watch video.

Reality TV

Ratan Tata, the owner of TATA industries is going to ax 1500 jobs in the UK because British workers are "lazy and unwilling to go the extra mile." Of course, he forgot to mention the real reason he is cutting those jobs - profit margins! Why pay someone £40 per hour when you can pay an indentured servant Indian worker in India £40 a year? Do the math.

Reality is hitting home as the impacts of all these bullish catastrophes around the world hit insurers. Of course, this is why Warren Buffet said to buy insurers. You don't need a Harvard degree or an overpaid job at Goldman Sachs to know there will be several more "AIG" bailouts lurking at every corner from Wall Street to Bangkok. No one even knows the impact of Fukushima (other than Warren Buffet who said it is bullish for the economy) on insurers and re-insurers like, Munich Re. And guess who's got a stake in that big boy? Not me.

Finally, in a mix of everything comical, the US 1Q GDP came it at - drum roll please - 1.8%. Now, if you consider that M1 money supply is pushing 12%, well, you can do the math. Guess Hu's who is paying that difference?